Time To Go Shopping.

2cd60d089427d0f7085613ac9aafc400I’m not as girly as I wish I were. I love fashion and internally am a fashionista. I know what’s in style and I love it. Layers, boots, leggings, infinity scarves, the list goes on. I like painted nails and getting pedicures. I could look on Pinterest all day long at long wavy hairstyles.

BUT nothing ever looks as good as it should when I try it. My nails chip as soon as I paint them. Curls fall flat no matter how many tutorials I watch and how much product I use. Being a fatty mcfatpants doesn’t help much either because the plus size world of fashion shouldn’t really be classified as fashion to begin with. Everything that I find either has thunder thighs or inseams too short. Shirts that don’t cover my butt or are made out of skin tight fabric. Whoever designs the majority of plus size clothing CLEARLY has no idea what it’s like.

e0dbca629f94c51c1c11c35b64209facAnd then you have the classic go to like Lane Bryant who I guess is fine but their clothes are really only built for one type of plus-size woman. They only look “okay” on a size 16. Anything else? Forget it.

I’m trying my best to turn around my shaded view around though. Because honestly, I haven’t really “tried” to find things that work for me for a couple years. I’ve recently been looking online and looking in the plus-size section of more stores to find something that will fit into today’s fashion (which I love) and can make me look as good as I can in my head.

If I’m being realistic though, I really haven’t put much effort into my outward appearance for a couple of years. Gaining weight really kills self-confidence when you didn’t have any to begin with. I don’t know if I’ll ever find the SC that I should have “discovered” years ago but it’s worth a try right?

1cd44a3df300dacfe774e08a7b7cade9Proofreading this, what I’m trying to say really isn’t coming out quite right. I really wish I could pull of the vintage-y, long sweaters, girly dresses, patterned leggings, biker boots, beach waves, size zero gauges look. Know what I mean? I could though, you know. I could try it and just not give a shit about what people will say and the looks I’ll get. Think to myself “screw ’em” when their eyes are screaming “she shouldn’t be wearing that, doesn’t she know she’s a big girl?”

Fuck, don’t even get me started on the term “big girl.” I’d rather someone tell me to my face how fat I am and that it grosses them out than have someone refer to me as a “big girl.”

Mreh.

I Bought Shoes Instead Of Booze.

Last night a group of co-workers went to a local bar for some drinks and music. I heard it was a great time. I would have loved to go but I didn’t. Mainly because I didn’t want to spend the $25 or more on a taxi there and back, $7 on a cover charge, and who knows how much on drinks. And besides, I didn’t want to feel like shit today.

Although I’m ultimately glad that I chose to stay home, it bums me out. Am I that much of a loser? I’m only 24, am I acting like an old hag? Am I cheap? I mean, I wanted to go. I like my co-workers (most of them anyways) and it would have been hella fun but I didn’t want to waste my money on it.

Instead of dwelling on what I didn’t do, I went to Payless and bought some shoes. Good compromise? I think so. Although I missed out on some memories that were made, at least I have shoes to show for my money rather than a hangover. Right?

A Hook And Yarn.

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Even though this was made pre-2014, I still wanted to share since I made some improvements on it tonight. (My “Do-Something” for the day!) I actually finished this in four hours on Sunday night so it wasn’t too long ago. One of my cousins wore one to our family Christmas last weekend and it looked super fun and very cute. This is what actually got my wheels turning on the entire new found hobbies for the new year thing-a-ma-jig. Thanks, Anna!
This was my first shot at crochet since high school. Add another big thanks to the World Wide Web, I was able to quickly re-teach myself the slip knot. I attempted using two different spools of yarn for a thicker look. The only fault in that was that I would have probably benefited by buying a larger hook.

I initially made this as an infinity scarf and wore it to work on Monday. I got quite a few compliments on it but found throughout the day that I had gotten some pieces twisted up which made it kind of a nuisance. So tonight, I undid the connecting area in the back and made it into a thicker scarf rather than the infinity style. I actually prefer this one better and think it turned out pretty sweet considering my first jab at it in seven years!

Scarf number two is in the works! More posts to come.